Valentine’s Day? I shouldn’t be writing this because I am not a romantic person like that. I should be pardoned if I don’t spice this post up with the lovey dovey texts you would have been expecting. I imagine you will find this a bit boring but please don’t get me wrong, LOVE indeed is a beautiful thing. I can count the amount of times I actually Valed someone (as some people will say). Hmmmmm let me see. I think 5 times including once in Junior High and a virtual Val’s day union. The high school Val’s day would probably be called “puppy love”. You know the I like you and you like me back ish. I didn’t have much to say and the reason for Valing her was because I didn’t want to be left out of the Val’s day virus.
The relationship didn’t even go past a month, that’s if there was one. I was just silly jare. I didn’t have an older sister (my mum blessed me with 3 older brothers) so I didn’t know what girls wanted or maybe I no just get sense and my brothers simply didn’t have time. No excuse, and that’s gone. At least I give am gift and I didn’t even get a handshake in return on that day. It was an awkward relationship. I was too shy to even start a convo with her. I could count the amount of times we spoke while it lasted.
The second attempt at having a Val was crappy too. It was just after high school. I totally lost out to another guy. Well he was kind of dating her before I met her. You know the I have broken up with him and oh we are back together sort of relationship. The time her cousin introduced her to me she had broken up with the guy. When Val reach they had made up. The babe just collect the wristwatch, perfume and card wey I buy for am. All I got was a hug.
The third babe was very ok. A little bit of love was involved but the problem was the absence. It was a long distant thing. Saw her once a year so Val’s day was a virtual something for us. We shared gifts though and I guess I didn’t lose much this time. I only lost out because I caused the end of the relationship.
The fourth was funny (anyway to me). When I met her, it was love at first sight. We had a lot in common. Val’s day and I was as broke as hell. I couldn’t even buy a card, I got cake on credit (I can’t even remember if I paid later) from my then hall mate. She made fantastic cakes that got most of us (especially the boys) that lived in that hall in trouble. We had to stop inviting chics over to our hall because dem go wan chop cake. Back to the Val gist, I was so ashamed of myself I couldn’t even give her the cake. I held on to the cake till 11:50pm on Val’s day and finally gathered courage a minute later to take the cake her. This conversation ensued between us;
Me: Happy Val’s day dear
Her: (smiling) if you had brought that cake a minute later I would have rejected it.
Silly me: it would be enough to last me a whole week
Her: Bring the cake jor and please pass me the knife
I hugged and pecked her, yeah just that. This Dipo dude no even get game jor (abi?). This babe was the only babe that I was closed to dating in that school (nobody believed me, no one ever will).
After this I went on Val celibacy for a while. Hope that made sense? Anyway I no Val anybody for close to 4 years well except some occasionally gifts for my mum (continue to rest in peace iya rere). I am not saying I didn’t date o and I no dey run when Val reach. I just had a motto which was “togetherness is the best gift”, it kinda paid off for a while. During my celibate seasons Ponche was my wing man. Y’all remember Ponche from my last post. He would be like damn Valentine’s Day lets go and eat fish and have a few drinks. We probably had more fun than the so called lovers. It was never a dull moment with this dude. I always wonder why he hasn’t been endorsed by any of the brewing companies in town. What a guy.
A selfless babe can however spoil me with gifts o. I sincerely won’t mind.
Ponche sure would be Valing his drinks, fish and the champions league. Yes the Champions league is back (thank you JESUS).
Thanks for reading my silly Valentine story. You guys should have fun and if you want to spend money on Val’s day you can consider Orphanages and other less privileged people. I hope no one is offended.
Cheers and Bless.
Twitter handles: @theswizzmemoirs or @dipoogun